Invader Zim Dare Show
by Cyrille Kiwi Lynn
Summary: Kiwi and Amber from Another Warriors Dare Show get together to make an Invader Zim dare show. With two emos, one goth, one annoyed alien, one insane robot, and one overly-used mallet.
1. Pilot

**Disclaimer thingy- I do not own Invader Zim. Jhonen Vasquez and Nick do. Lucky…**

**Warning- Contains language and violence.**

**Invader Zim Dare Show**

Kiwi ~ A teal haired girl with long straight ponytails. She wears a torn up black tee with a skull, and black frayed mini shorts with a bulky black studded buckle.

Amber ~ long dark brown almost black wavy hair with bright stunning pale olive green eyes. Wears a black long sleeved shirt with a very dark holly green mini skirt and black boots

Kiwi- *sitting on a floating irken chair* Welcome to our show of doom.

Amber- Introduce the viewers a little bit more warmly.

Kiwi- It's my show; I can do whatever the hell I want. Like fire you.

Amber- I don't get paid enough for this.

Kiwi- You don't get paid at all. Anyway, the Invader Zim dare show is a show where I will take requests for the truths and dares I do. Please request the strangest, most embarrassing and/or most extreme ideas you can think of. Me and Amber can also receive dares and truths although I'm not sure what a good truth would be for us. And because this is heavily influenced off of Amber's own show, here is an example truth, and an example dare.

Amber- Oooooh, can we do the dare first? I really really really like this one!

Kiwi- *evil smile* so do I. Ok, Gir! I summon you!

Gir- *Appears in front of them* -or I'll explode… Where am I? Where did my toes go?

Amber- Gir, you never had, nor will you ever have toes.

Kiwi- He might've one day, if they didn't cancel the show…

Amber- Let's do the dare before Kiwi starts to act irrationally. We need Gaz also.

Gaz- *Appears* …

Gir- *runs over to Gaz* What you do? What you do? What you do?

Gaz- *punches Gir in the eye* … Grrrrr…

Amber- We need to hurry up, we're running out of- OW!

Kiwi- Next time you interrupt my show, I'll punch you in the -

Gir- TACOOOOOOOSSS

Kiwi- Ew, no.

Amber- Dude, that's just… DUDE!

Kiwi- Anyways, Gir, your dare is to kiss Gaz.

Gaz- *Eyes practically pop out of head.* WHAT! *lunges at Kiwi*

Amber- *Pulls out giant mallet from who the hell knows where* Get down, savage beast!

Gaz- Where the fuck did you get that?

Amber- *Whacks Gaz* You do not want to know.

Kiwi- Oh!

Gir- *Runs up and French kisses Gaz*

Gaz- *Too shocked to do anything*

Amber & Kiwi- …

Gaz- *Punches Gir's other eye out* Don't ever do that again. *Steals Amber's mallet and squashes Gir* Bastard.

Gaz and crushed Gir disappear. Mallet stays behind for Amber to retrieve it.

Kiwi- Ok then. Onto the truth. Tak?

Tak- *appears in front of Kiwi* Whoa, how did I get here?

Amber- It's better not to ask questions, it hurts your brain.

Kiwi- Tak, answer truthfully, or else you get hit in the head with the mallet. Ok, what was the strangest night of your life? With details please.

Tak- (with a face like a tomato) Uhh…

Amber- I have a feeling this will be good.

Tak- Well… See, when me and Zim were on Earth together, he thought I liked him. To prove that theory, he, uhh…

Kiwi- Spit it out.

Tak- Well, he took me to a bar, and we got kind of carried away and lost count of how many drinks we'd had. Then we, uh, uhm…

Amber- *raises mallet*

Tak- Woah, don't hit me! Ok! Fine! We went skinny dipping in some random person's pool.

Amber- *Mouth wide open* …

Kiwi- *Rolling on the floor laughing her guts out, literally* Oh that was not supposed to come ou… KIDNEY! Eww… Ok, then what happened?

Amber- Alien lemon?

Tak- No! We fell asleep. *WHACK* OW! Ok, fine, yes. Alien lemon. Are you satisfied?

Kiwi- No *Grabs mallet and whacks Tak* Now I am.

Tak- OW! You mother fu- *disappears*

Kiwi- Aww, she was about to recite a long string of repulsive language.

Amber- I think we've used enough profanity for this episode, which by the way, it's time to go.

Kiwi- Ok, fine. Well, I guess that's the end of episode one of-

Gir- The dare show of DOOM!

Amber- *Hits with mallet* Where did you come from?

Gir- *Takes deep breathe and prepares to explain how robot babies are born* We come ou-

Kiwi- That's not appropriate for TV, even for this show.

Amber- Oh, god! What is it?

Kiwi- *whispers in Amber's ear*

Amber- OH, GOD! *Turns to Gir* Dude! DUDE! WTF?

Kiwi- *waves at camera* Well, goodnight to you all!

Amber- How do you know that?

Kiwi- Please don't ask.

Amber- Bye.


	2. Episode 1

Disclaimer thingy- I do not own Invader Zim. Jhonen Vasquez and Nick do. Maybe I can make a deal with them? And bring Ambers mallet along if they say no.

Warning- Contains language and violence.

Invader Zim Dare Show

Kiwi- Welcome. It hasn't even been a whole week, yet here we are, doing another episode…

Amber- In a small deserted town, so very sad and lonely, two girls live there.

Kiwi- Cut the emo crap.

Amber- I already am…

Kiwi- O.o… Amber! Put that knife away!

Amber- … Fine.

Kiwi- Ok, today, we have… how many dares?

Amber- Four, and they're all from Tyrant wolf on FanFic. But we only do two per episode. The first one requires Zim and Gaz.

Kiwi- And Dib. We can't forget the biggest head of them all.

Amber- Ah yes. Ok, Gaz, Zim and Dib!

Gaz appears playing her little Vampire Piggies. Zim is holding a beaker of green slime, and Dib is sucking his thumb.

Amber- Dib, seriously?

Dib- What? I'm delicious.

Zim- *innocent smile* Which was totally not caused by me.

Dib- Uhh, kay then. Anyway, who are you people?

Kiwi- It's your fuckin nightmare!

Amber- Sorry, Kiwi has been listening to the radio too much. But all you need to know is that I'm Amber, and this is Kiwi.

Kiwi- On to the first dare, shall we?

Amber- Yes!

Kiwi- Ok. Zim and Gaz, you two have to make out for at least one minute.

Gaz- HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE YOU GONNA MAKE ME FUCKIN KISS ON THIS FUCKIN SHOW?

Kiwi- As many as the audience wants.

Gaz- *Twitches vigorously, then relaxes* Fine…

Amber- Dib, you also have to watch that. And you have to be strapped down to a chair that's nailed to the floor.

Dib- NOOOOOOO! Wait, why do I have to be strapped down?

Kiwi- In case you try to run away. Okay, Amber, please put dib in the chair.

Dib get's strapped down to a chair that's nailed to the floor.

Kiwi- Thank you. And you two, kiss, now!

Gaz- Zim. I will kill myself and you after this, ok?

Zim- *gulps* kay.

Gaz- *grabs Zim by the throat and squeezes. Pulls him closer and kisses him while he runs out of oxygen.*

1 minute later.

Amber and Kiwi- *Sitting there giggling*

Dib- My eyes… they completely disappeared. Where did they go?

Gaz- *punches Zim*

Zim falls unconscious

Amber- Nice. You may go, except you, Dib. Except you.

Dib- Please don't tell me…

Kiwi- Yep! There's another dare for you!

Dib- Noooooooo!

Kiwi- Yaaaaaaaay!

Amber- Dib, Tyrant wolf wants you to watch two girls one cup.

Dib- What?

Kiwi- Ah, he doesn't know.

Amber- Poor innocent little creature.

Kiwi- Yes, for we shall tear his innocence to shreds.

Amber- Just like we do for everyone else.

Dib- Ok, can you just give me new eyes so I can watch the video?

Amber- Ok. *magically produces new eye balls*

Dib- *Watching video* … *explodes.*

Amber- Aw, he exploded before we could finish the rest of the dare.

Kiwi- What was the rest of the dare?

Amber- Have him watch all the episodes of Barney.

Kiwi- Well, that was the second dare for today, and we only take two dares per episode.

Amber- WAIT! *Holds up mallet* Before we go, we have to use the mallet. It hasn't even been brought out!

Kiwi- Ok. *Grabs mallet* Bye! *smashes camera, screen goes into static.*

Random voice- _Whooooo, staaaaatiiiiiic._


	3. Episode 2

**Disclaimer thingy- I do not own Invader Zim. Jhonen Vasquez and Nick do. That's been established three times now. I also don't own BOTDF... I wish I did.**

**Warning- Contains language and violence. And a line from a sexual song. (Blood on The Dancefloor!)**

**Invader Zim Dare Show**

Wolfie- Black hair and black jeans with chains. A black sweater over a red shirt. His bangs almost cover his eyes.

Kiwi- *Rockin out on her iPod.* You scream, "MEAT SUCKS!" Well you're out of luck.

Amber- Dude, enough with the innapropriate songs

Kiwi- Why?

Amber- We're on air.

Kiwi- *eyes widen* ... So I just said that on air?

Amber- *nods*

Kiwi- Kay then... moving on.

Amber- Anyway, welcome to Invader Zim Dare Show.

Kiwi- We have only been doing this for not even a week, yet the dares are flooding in.

Amber- so, to continue Tyrant Wolf's dares... Tallest red!

Tallest Red- *Appears in front of Amber* Who are you?

Amber- Why does everyone ask that when they get here?

Kiwi- I dunno.

Amber- That was rhetorical, but whatever. Kiwi, don't you have someone you need to go get?

Kiwi- What?... OH MY GOD! I TOTALLY FORGOT! *runs out of room*

Amber- Yay, she's gone. Now let's hope she trips on a rock and dies. Tallest Red? Do you know why you are here?

Tallest Red- ... Snacks?

Amber- *Face palm* No snacks. You are here to do your dare.

Tallest Red-... What?

Amber- *Pulls out her mallet and whacks tallest red.*

TR- OW!

Amber- *holding up a magical screen that just appeared* You have been dared to lick this bathroom clean, and like it.

Bathroom- The floor is covered in a layer of green thick scum. There are rats running around, and there is molded spaghetti plastered onto the walls. Flies are flying around, eating the dead rats... You don't even want to know what's in the bath behind the curtain...

TR- *Starts crying.*

Amber- Go now. Go lick it clean. It's your destiny.

TR- *walks out of the room and passes by Kiwi*

Kiwi- *Just coming back, stares at TR with weirded out eyes. Behind her is a mystery guy.*

Amber- Ahh, here comes Kiwi and Wolfie.

Kiwi- *points to guy* This is Wolfie. He's a friend of mine, and when he saw the previous episodes, he wanted to be put in. Any other requests though are forbidden. This show does not need any more hosts.

Wolfie- Hi there.

Amber- We gotta hurry up. We just did the one for Tallest Red by Tyrant wolf.

Kiwi- Kay. Next is Tallest Purple.

TP- * Holding up a microphone.* Attention please. Everyone on the dancefloor freeze. Reassume the position and bleed! *opens eyes* Uhhhhhh...

Kiwi- I love that song! It's on my iPod.

Amber- Tallest Purple, you have to walk Tyrant Wolf's pet... What?

Wolfie- Xenomorph. It's that alien with the head that looks like a-

Amber- OH! Right, moving on.

Xenomorph- *Appears on stage*

Tallest Purple- Come here, good Xenomorph. Over here. OH GOD, BAD XENO-

Censored...

Kiwi- *Standing in a room full of alien guts.* Well, that's gonna take a long time to clean up. Maybe we could take a break in the time?

Wolfie- Maybe. Hey, can I try something?

Kiwi- What?

Wolfie- *Whispers into Kiwi's ear.*

Kiwi- HELLZ YEAH!. SHE'S GONNA GET SO FUCKIN PISSED!

Amber- What?

Wolfie- *Steals Amber's mallet*

Amber- HEY! GET BACK HERE YOU DEAD SONUVABITCH! *chases Wolfie around the room*

Tallest Red- *walks in crying with a green bloody hairy tounge* I'm done.

Wolfie- *Whacks TR with mallet.*

Kiwi- More Alien guts. Awesome!

Amber- Well, I guess thats the end of it. Bye

Kiwi- Baiz!

Wolfie- Bye!


End file.
